here we are again, on therapy day. No deep probing release of memories. Just a check in. Still, there is unsettledness. Last night there was sleeplessness. It makes me wonder if those reactions are just about the anxiety of going to therapy.
That sleeplessness the night before is always littles. Wondering who will share this time. Discussing what will happen in therapy. Just being little and horrified. The unsettledness afterwards of what has been shared. The aftermath of everyone inside now knowing these things. Feeling these things now. That integration process of these trauma memories.
I didn’t make it to class after therapy today. It’s a new semester and my schedule is ridiculous. I wonder if these reactions will ever go away completely. They have shortened in time from a couple of days to one day.
How long is a piece of string?