I am bursting with all kinds of everything. The first thing I did was email a recording to my T and close friends. My littles talked out loud. I went to talk to myself out loud at home alone and little words came out. So excited. So naturally the second thing I did was start writing here.
My littles have not had external voices yet. In therapy and shiatsu none of our adult parts have been able to talk while our littles are in the body. They are constantly chattering away inside. Talking about all kinds of things and running around screaming. These first external words are so precious. I can hear the difference in them. There are two littles speaking. Clearly different from each other. Saying words they have often typed. Words we have heard before inside. Now I can hear them outside.
It means our blocker has backed off. That it is now considered safe to talk. To talk about the abuse perhaps. It has been difficult to navigate shiatsu and the deeper parts of therapy when unable to speak. We cannot say stop when shiatsu effects the body too much. We have a safety stone which we roll out when we want to stop. When we go into memories and feeling in therapy we cannot talk. We simply stay with our littles as they put the two together and our adult brain begins to adjust and accept the things shared there. This is a big step for us. Hopefully the start of a big move forwards.