Sometimes it’s really hard to speak. To let out what is inside.
There are so many things whirling around internally.
Someone inside is processing a lot of pain. Learning acceptance of us a village. I can feel the hurt. The wondering if we will ever find someone who can love us in a healthy way. All of our previous partners were not good choices. So we had stopped searching in that area until we are in a more healthy place. We figure healthy people attract other healthy people.
There is also pain about Halloween. It was our first fully self aware Halloween. Was very scary to be aware of all the things going on inside. All the fear and stirring up of memories of past halloweens in our childhood. Past abuse.
We have voices. We just haven’t been able to use them in a while.